My way

This picture (without my hair ;-) symbolizes my current way of life. I now know where it is leading, since I can see a bit of the pinewood (pinewoods are my favourite woods, the light and walking in them is always amazing) on the horizon, the weather is nice, but the next stretch is beige = boring, ugh. So this is probably the reason why I stalled this last week. I know exactly what I want, where I am headed, but this next stretch of my way is just ...
Well, today the sun shines, which is always something that puts me into the mood to get going and doing and making my way. Okay, I switched the music to something pushing me forward. Let's get this beige stretch get over and done with!

I wish all of you a wonderful weekend, let's make the best of it.

Outside

Have you ever had such days on which you can't fully wake up, but neither sleep to get rid of the tiredness? Yesterday was such a day for me. Even though I've been out and about, I couldn't shake off the tiredness or take a refreshing nap.

Today is much better and I will use it to finally cross off a lot of items from to-do-list.

One thing was good yesterday, I realized that the changes I made at the of 2011 are starting to really make a positive difference in my life.
For example I finally started to write down what I spend everyday, again (I did so in university but through the past years I didn't). Which means I now know exactly where my money went. I stopped shopping groceries with my Dad, which lead to less spending and less leftover food. I've become a conscious spender, which means I think before I buy something, does it take me nearer to my goals or further away.

Being a conscious spender has made probably the biggest impact, that and the fact that I now know my goals. It's quite funny, goals make everything easier.
And because those changes are finally getting a grip and speeding me up towards my goals, it was yesterday for the first time that I actually had the feeling that I will reach this years goals. Which feels fantastic!!

A window, a lamp with a shadow and the sky

Twilight in the city

One of my favourites. I think the light and colours are just awesome. No filters or wrong processing. I just love it.

Threshold crossed

I've been planning to make big drawings (A4, A3 and so forth) for about one year now. However while I wanted too and bought the big paper I never truly felt comfortable drawing big. I have my easel and the A2 paper for 3 months now, but I never used it. Instead I went back to smaller formats, postcards and maybe 20x20 cm. They were feeling safe and being fast. (I'm sooooo impatient.)

Today I finally went into the other direction while drawing I switched from postcard size to 20x20 cm to A2 and back to 30x30 cm. And it felt great to finally draw big, like letting lose, essentially it felt like freedom.

I've also decided that 2012 I will concentrate on drawing by hand. Why does this matter? Well, during the last two weeks I've stocked up on technology and frankly I was tempted to also get a graphic tablet like the Wacom Bamboo, and I started pondering the question of which graphic software I should get this year. Just a few minutes ago I realized that I was falling into my old behaviour, falling into the old traps.
I was so occupied with the future that I forgot the present. And at the moment I need my focus to be on my drawing skills, which frankly are underdeveloped. I have a certain vision for what my style is or, more exactly, of what I want it to be, however I simply lack the necessary drawing skills to get even close to the pictures that I want to create.

So right here and now I stop, take a deep breath, take a look around and focus on the next step that I take. Here and now are most important. To build my castle in the sky I have to start where I am. Learning to draw properly.